Her Turn - Notes
Jan. 13th, 2014 11:05 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
mayalaenMaster Post || Prologue || 1 || 2 || 3 || 4 || 5 || 6 || 7 || 8 || Epilogue || Notes
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Notes & Pics - NSFW!
The Prompt
When I saw The Prompt at![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
spnkink_meme, I immediately wanted to challenge myself with it.
I'm female, and while I'm more comfortable with being female now, as a kid I strongly identified with, played with, and fit in with boys nearly exclusively.
Some of the thoughts in Dean's head about gender issues were the same things I've dealt with, and in particular the issues of what gender reassignment surgery entails and also being a tomboy and dealing with sneering little girls who thought it odd I played with boys.
I'm still more comfortable around guys. I still fit in with them better. I'm also bisexual, which has made it easier to keep myself relatively safe from bigotry, though of course it's still out there.
In writing this fic, trying to “be” Dean and see things from his point of view in a situation where he wanted the exact opposite of what I wanted was interesting, fun, and definitely a challenge.
There were plenty of things written into this fic where I just had to put myself in his place and work it out, other situations where I just took my experiences/viewpoints and flipped my ideas from male to female.
Felicia
I really like Felicia. I like that she's a geek, that she has an infectious smile and laughter, that she's got an intensity to her that fills up a room. I like that she has no problem giving her brother shit while at the same time is obviously very close with him.
The characters she plays usually are an extension of herself with small tweaks to her personality. I got a huge girl crush on her minutes into her first Eureka episode because her character was geeky, a little shy, but straight forward about sex without doing the whole flirting and dating dance, her character having what someone might describe as a guy's attitude toward sex in general, which I identified with right away.
I'd wanted to write a Supernatural fic including Charlie's character for a while, but I also wanted her with Dean because of reasons. When I saw this prompt, I was thrilled!
There aren't many female characters in the Supernatural world who aren't dead or too evil for me to see Dean settling down with, and I didn't want to change Charlie's character from lesbian to a heterosexual female just because I wanted to put her with Dean.
The prompt gave me a great reason to put her with Dean (Dee) and write them as in-character as possible for the situation. All credit for that goes to the OP because I never would have come up with the idea that Dean was a lesbian stuck in a male body.
I didn't expect this to be over 70,000 words, but I've never been able to do a mini-fill anyway. The other fills I've participated in have taken at least three posts.
I hope the OP don't mind, but I tweaked part of the request -- “always known she (Dean) was a female” -- because Dean's personality lends itself (IMO) to being stubbornly hard on himself, so while the pronouns changed quickly when coming from Charlie and Sam after they learn about Dee's wishes, Dean takes longer to let herself have that in her own head, and this story is from Dean's POV.
I just wanted it stated clearly that this wasn't my own opinion regarding transgendered individuals. The idea of what should or shouldn't be physically changed before a transgendered person should be allowed the pronoun of their choice was how I felt Dean would feel about it, not how I feel on the matter.
Scrapbook
I'm linking to a Scrapbook I made just for this fic because I used a lot of visuals while I was writing. The clothes and toys were the ones I had in mind while I was writing. I made the manip'd banner for this fic myself, using pictures of both Felicia and Irina, a Russian model.
Irina has beautiful green eyes, gorgeous lips, dirty blonde hair, and she also has a jawline and eye shape I could see closely resembling Jensen's features if his were softened a bit. Irina is younger than Jensen, which I looked for in a model because I figured a newly-remade body would be without the wear and tear of even a 35-year-old's body.
I also included a picture of Felicia and Jensen at one of the latest cons they both attended because I think it's one of the cutest pictures ever. She has an amazing smile, and they both look adorable hugging in that pic.
I like to think the two of them get along well in almost a big brother/little sister way, even though Jensen is fairly shy and Felicia is intense and full of energy. I like to imagine she makes him smile and laugh.
The Clothes Used
Charlie's Batman Outfit & Dean's Boyshorts
Dean's Skirt & Charlie's Sundress
The Dildos Used
Tentacle and Alien Dildos
Dildo for Skirt Scene and Dee's First Time Dildo
Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed the ride.
~Maya
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Notes & Pics - NSFW!
The Prompt
When I saw The Prompt at
spnkink_meme, I immediately wanted to challenge myself with it.I'm female, and while I'm more comfortable with being female now, as a kid I strongly identified with, played with, and fit in with boys nearly exclusively.
Some of the thoughts in Dean's head about gender issues were the same things I've dealt with, and in particular the issues of what gender reassignment surgery entails and also being a tomboy and dealing with sneering little girls who thought it odd I played with boys.
I'm still more comfortable around guys. I still fit in with them better. I'm also bisexual, which has made it easier to keep myself relatively safe from bigotry, though of course it's still out there.
In writing this fic, trying to “be” Dean and see things from his point of view in a situation where he wanted the exact opposite of what I wanted was interesting, fun, and definitely a challenge.
There were plenty of things written into this fic where I just had to put myself in his place and work it out, other situations where I just took my experiences/viewpoints and flipped my ideas from male to female.
Felicia
I really like Felicia. I like that she's a geek, that she has an infectious smile and laughter, that she's got an intensity to her that fills up a room. I like that she has no problem giving her brother shit while at the same time is obviously very close with him.
The characters she plays usually are an extension of herself with small tweaks to her personality. I got a huge girl crush on her minutes into her first Eureka episode because her character was geeky, a little shy, but straight forward about sex without doing the whole flirting and dating dance, her character having what someone might describe as a guy's attitude toward sex in general, which I identified with right away.
I'd wanted to write a Supernatural fic including Charlie's character for a while, but I also wanted her with Dean because of reasons. When I saw this prompt, I was thrilled!
There aren't many female characters in the Supernatural world who aren't dead or too evil for me to see Dean settling down with, and I didn't want to change Charlie's character from lesbian to a heterosexual female just because I wanted to put her with Dean.
The prompt gave me a great reason to put her with Dean (Dee) and write them as in-character as possible for the situation. All credit for that goes to the OP because I never would have come up with the idea that Dean was a lesbian stuck in a male body.
I didn't expect this to be over 70,000 words, but I've never been able to do a mini-fill anyway. The other fills I've participated in have taken at least three posts.
I hope the OP don't mind, but I tweaked part of the request -- “always known she (Dean) was a female” -- because Dean's personality lends itself (IMO) to being stubbornly hard on himself, so while the pronouns changed quickly when coming from Charlie and Sam after they learn about Dee's wishes, Dean takes longer to let herself have that in her own head, and this story is from Dean's POV.
I just wanted it stated clearly that this wasn't my own opinion regarding transgendered individuals. The idea of what should or shouldn't be physically changed before a transgendered person should be allowed the pronoun of their choice was how I felt Dean would feel about it, not how I feel on the matter.
Scrapbook
I'm linking to a Scrapbook I made just for this fic because I used a lot of visuals while I was writing. The clothes and toys were the ones I had in mind while I was writing. I made the manip'd banner for this fic myself, using pictures of both Felicia and Irina, a Russian model.
Irina has beautiful green eyes, gorgeous lips, dirty blonde hair, and she also has a jawline and eye shape I could see closely resembling Jensen's features if his were softened a bit. Irina is younger than Jensen, which I looked for in a model because I figured a newly-remade body would be without the wear and tear of even a 35-year-old's body.
I also included a picture of Felicia and Jensen at one of the latest cons they both attended because I think it's one of the cutest pictures ever. She has an amazing smile, and they both look adorable hugging in that pic.
I like to think the two of them get along well in almost a big brother/little sister way, even though Jensen is fairly shy and Felicia is intense and full of energy. I like to imagine she makes him smile and laugh.
The Clothes Used
Charlie's Batman Outfit & Dean's Boyshorts
Dean's Skirt & Charlie's Sundress
The Dildos Used
Tentacle and Alien Dildos
Dildo for Skirt Scene and Dee's First Time Dildo
Thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed the ride.
~Maya
