happy hamster!

[mayalaen]

My dad has this super condescending way of talking to people, and if you call him on it, he plays it off like aw naw he was just being cutesy but you KNOW it was meant to be insulting.

When I was a kid, I remember redoing my room. I was so proud of it. My mom helped and let me pick out a lot of stuff and we did a lot of stuff ourselves instead of just buying because we didn't have much money.

I wanted to show my dad (for some reason) and he came in and was like "aww the little hamster got new sawdust for her cage" and walked out.

I knew it was an insult at the time even though I was only 7, but I was also a really stubborn 7yo and I was like well hell yeah it's new sawdust and a new chewy toy and color-coordinated cardboard hangouts and...

So now when I see people post pictures of their rooms -- all proud of themselves and happy in their newly renovated spaces -- I can't help but think about them as a happy little hamster squeeing over how content and comfy their new space makes them.

I recently redid my room (and didn't show my dad btw) and there's so much less stuff and more blankets on the walls but with material covers on them so there's not as much of a chaotic feeling in the room (I have a bunch of hand-me-down blankets from people and none of them match).

Got rid of a bunch of clothes I don't wear anymore, so my closet is organized and only has a few things in it! I don't like having a lot of stuff -- I've always felt overwhelmed by STUFF.

My room is so quiet and calm and there's only a plain bed and a nightstand thingy and did I mention it's quiet in there?!

Happy hamster!!